Season of the Witch (1972)
Starring: Jan White, Raymond Laine, Ann Muffly
What's all this then?: I’ll be clear from the start and admit that I watched this film because I thought it was Season of the Witch starring Nicolas Cage and Robert Sheehan from out of Misfits (an up-and-coming young mentalist himself and potential heir to Cage’s loony throne). So sadfaces all round when it turned out to be an odd little feminist-baiting witch film by George A. Romero from the early seventies. It’s still mental though so no harm done.
Say what?: Season of the Witch apparently concerns ‘a bored, unhappy suburban housewife who gets mixed up in witchcraft and murder’ which is kind of true, but in the same way that Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans is about a member of the police force investigating drug-related deaths in Louisiana. No I won’t be dropping the tenuous link to Nicolas Cage.
Some notes: These were all written during the first three minutes.
- A woman follows a man in a business suit through a forest, absently reading a newspaper. She gets hit repeatedly in the face by branches as she walks behind him. He also eats an egg with his bare hands and then there's a surprise baby in the flowers. SYMBOLISM Y’ALL.
- Then she’s on a swing in a white cotton dress. Bodyform for you.
- Hipster Kennel, newspaper-slapping
- Phew but thank god it was all a dream. It’s probably nothing, wouldn’t worry about it. The end!
About the Hipster Kennel:
Then what happens?: Joan Mitchell (who most characters refer to as Joanie throughout the film which is more distracting that you’d think) starts to go a bit potty after her daughter leaves for college but women’s-liberation-so-hush-now-it’s-the-seventies. Women be drinkin’!
For reasons I can’t recall, possibly the weird hipster kennel dreams, Joanie decides to become a witch. This comes fairly easy to her because apparently all it takes is a bit of bargain hunting and some ingredients for curry.
For everything else, there’s MasterCharge. This is a fairly significant shopping montage, because afterwards she’s basically a witch.
That was fast!
To witch a long story short: She has an affair with her daughter’s boyfriend and then shoots her husband dead because she thought he was the evil dream monster trying to break into her house. This makes her a complete and utter…