Wednesday, April 7, 2010

An open letter to the future

As someone who greets each Skynet-friendly amazing development in robotics with a healthy dose of fear and disgust, this new towel-folding robot should have been terrifying.

Instead it was kind of disheartening. I mean apparently it takes twenty minutes to fold a single towel. A TEA TOWEL? This seems to further emphasise that not only will we fail to see the machines take over in our lifetime, but we most likely won't all have Robin Williams-inspired robot butlers either. Who in the hell is my imaginary grand-daughter going to marry now? A human man? A human woman? That's not the imaginary future I signed up for.

With that in mind here's another petty grievance I have with a certain future-focused pop culture entity of my youth and young ranthood:

Robert Zemeckis, you have five years from now in which to develop hover boards as affordable, recreational products or I'm uniting the youth of the late 1980s to mount a civil lawsuit against you. In fairness we've upheld our part of the bargain by styling ourselves on the post-millennial kids of Back to the Future: Part II:

Queue for Dalston Superstore, January 2010

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