Monday, February 16, 2009

You could kiss my rebel coochie.


Black Snake Moan (2006)

Starring: Christina Ricci, Samuel L. Jackson, Justin Timberlake, A big ole chain

The Gist: Once upon a time there was a girl (Ricci) in a small white-trash town in the Deep South. The girl was in love with a quite-slow version of Justin Timberlake, until he stupidly enlisted in the army and got posted to "The I-raq". Then the girl went hog wild and started getting drunk and having sex with everyone. One night J Tizzle’s friend is mean to her face with his fists and leaves her battered and bruised on the side of the road. Fear not, children, for a kindly religious man takes her into his home. And wraps a big metal chain around her waist and ties it to his radiator.

And then what happens?:
The nice man sets about curing the girl of her “fever” which manifests itself in Ricci writhing about all sweaty in a bra and some underpants then hopping on any man who happens to wander into the house. The initial chain shenanigans are the highlight of the film, with plenty of angry “Git this chain offa me mister/Hell I will” style exchanges. Then we get to the banal “Mah daddy didn’t treat me no good/My wife done up and died” root of the problem, people learn life lessons and bla bla dee bla bla bla. Yes it was fun while it lasted, but you can’t have everything.

See it for:
Ricci. She’s one of few actresses who could pull off this kind of character and be even halfway believable. There’s this bug-eyed quality to her where you honestly don’t know what she’ll do next.

Level of Crazy: 6. Get yo ass back in my house!

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